This article “We are not OK”, from The Autistic Advocate, is not an easy read.
I wouldn’t recommend it if you are feeling down. BUT it’s important to recognise the side effects of masking (pretending to be neurotypical). For this reason, I’d say the article is of more benefit to the neurotypicals in our life. For them to see and – hopefully – understand.
It contains a brief introduction, content warnings, and then a loooong list of comments from autists/autistic people on how they feel about masking, repercussions, anxiety and depression. I’ll be honest, I didn’t read them all.